The image shows an infant with a shaved head wearing thick-rimmed glasses and a light-colored long-sleeved shirt. The child is seated against a plain dark backdrop, resting hands on a surface with striped fabric visible at the bottom edge.
Child in festive holiday costume sitting on a sofa.
A toddler is seated on a dark-colored couch, wearing a blue outfit that includes a long-sleeved shirt with cartoon graphics and a matching hat featuring red antlers. The child has light skin and short hair visible beneath the hat.
A candid black and white family portrait featuring three individuals.
The image shows a man wearing glasses looking upward while holding a baby wrapped in a blanket or hooded garment. To his right stands a smiling boy wearing a dark t-shirt with a graphic design on it. The photo is monochrome and appears to be taken indoors.
A woman smiles while holding two babies, one of whom is playfully hiding behind a large white plate.
A woman with dark hair tied back smiles broadly at the camera while holding two young children. The child on the left holds a large white circular object in front of their face, partially obscuring it, while the child on the right looks toward the camera. In the background, two men sit against a wooden fence.
Toddler sits on garden steps surrounded by colorful flowers.
A toddler with short blond hair is seated on weathered wooden steps outdoors. The child wears a long-sleeved striped shirt under denim overalls, white socks, and dark shoes with red accents. They hold a small yellow object in one hand and appear to be looking down at it. Behind them are green bushes and tulips in yellow, red, and orange, along with purple grape hyacinths.
A woman holds a baby dressed in formal attire, including a top hat.
An older woman with short gray hair is seated indoors, holding a baby on her lap. The baby wears a black top hat and a light-colored ruffled outfit over dark clothing. A blue patterned blanket or fabric is visible in the foreground.
A man holds a baby while a cat rests on his lap.
A person with glasses wearing a dark blue long-sleeved shirt is seated in a dark upholstered armchair. They are holding a swaddled infant in their left arm, and a grey tabby cat is lying across their lap. The background includes a plain wall and part of a white door frame.
A nurse cares for a newborn in an incubator at a hospital.
A woman wearing a blue apron over a white shirt stands beside a medical incubator containing a newborn infant. The room is filled with medical equipment, including monitors and tubing, suggesting an intensive care environment.
A joyful child celebrates with arms raised high while standing on stairs.
A young child with short hair and round glasses is standing on wooden steps, wearing a green patterned onesie with fruit designs. The child has both arms raised in the air and is smiling broadly. Behind the child is a brick wall and part of a vacuum cleaner to the right.
Men working on a wooden playhouse in a yard.
A wooden playhouse with a blue, green, and yellow striped roof stands in a grassy backyard. Two men are visible near the structure; one appears to be adjusting or inspecting part of the frame while another looks on. A small yellow slide is partially visible at the bottom foreground.
Baby in a white onesie resting on a dark background.
The image shows an infant lying on their back on a dark, textured surface. The baby is dressed in a light-colored, long-sleeved onesie with small pink and blue patterns. To the left of the baby is a folded piece of fabric or blanket with a plaid pattern in pastel colors.
A man uses a computer while a young child stands on his shoulders nearby.
An indoor scene shows a man seated at a desk using an older CRT monitor, with a small child in a red shirt and yellow pants standing on his shoulders. The child reaches toward books on a wooden bookshelf that also holds various papers and objects. A calendar hangs on the wall to the right.
Three men and a baby pose together in an indoor setting.
A man in a striped shirt holds a baby while two other men stand beside him. The room contains a wooden table and framed artwork on the wall.
Toddler standing barefoot on carpet facing away from camera.
A young child wearing only a white diaper stands with their back to the camera, leaning against a dark blue upholstered sofa. The room has patterned textiles and wooden furniture visible in the background.
A baby sits in a high chair with a tuft of hair on top.
The image shows a young child seated in a blue plastic high chair with patterned fabric. The child has short, light-colored hair styled upward at the crown and is wearing a white long-sleeved garment. Their hands are clasped together in front of them.
A smiling toddler in a patterned jumpsuit sits on stairs.
A young child with short hair and round glasses is sitting on wooden steps, wearing a blue patterned onesie with dark cuffs and white socks. The background includes a brick wall and a doorway.
A man works with a tool on the floor while a young child watches.
An adult male wearing glasses, a white graphic t-shirt, and blue jeans is kneeling on a wooden surface. He holds a silver metal tool in his hands near a long piece of lumber. A small toddler in a dark blue outfit sits to the left, looking down at the floor.
A toddler interacts with a red tricycle indoors.
A young child wearing glasses and a dark green outfit is bending over a red plastic tricycle on a beige carpet. The room contains a large black television set in the background, along with various household items and furniture.
A cute baby dressed in a stylish outfit with a hat and glasses.
The image shows a young child seated on a brown upholstered couch. The child is wearing round wire-rimmed glasses, a black turtleneck sweater, and a beige textured vest or jumper. A black wide-brimmed hat sits atop the child's head. The child has light hair and is smiling slightly at the camera.
Man and child working together on a wooden deck.
A person wearing a white graphic t-shirt and blue jeans is kneeling on a wooden deck, using a power tool on a long piece of lumber. A small child in a dark blue long-sleeved shirt sits nearby holding a hammer. The background includes a table with various items and a chair.
A man relaxes on a bed while a baby lies beside him.
An adult male with short dark hair and glasses is seated on a bed covered with striped bedding. A baby wearing a light blue outfit is lying on the bed near his legs. The background includes a wooden headboard and a curtain.
A peaceful newborn baby resting in a yellow outfit.
The image shows a close-up of an infant with fair skin, sparse reddish-brown hair, and closed eyes. The baby is dressed in a pale yellow garment adorned with a silver flower-shaped brooch on the chest. A clear nasal cannula tube is visible under the nose, suggesting medical monitoring or support. The infant lies on a soft white blanket with lace trim.
A young boy in overalls and glasses poses for a photo.
A young child with short hair and round glasses is seated, wearing dark green corduroy overalls over a striped long-sleeve shirt. Behind him to the left is a blue baby seat or rocker decorated with cartoon characters. The background includes a plain wall with an electrical outlet and carpeted flooring.
Family portrait with three people posing in front of a decorated Christmas tree.
Three individuals are seated on the floor in front of a Christmas tree adorned with red ornaments. The person on the left wears a blue denim shirt and glasses, the person on the right wears a black top with a patterned scarf, and the child in the center sits wearing a dark sweater and beige pants.
Children posing with a Christmas tree at a tree lot.
A boy wearing glasses, a navy blue Penn State hoodie, and red sweatpants stands between two girls. The girl on the left wears a pink zip-up jacket and black pants; the girl on the right wears a graphic zip-up hoodie and jeans. They are standing in front of a large evergreen tree at what appears to be a Christmas tree farm.
A young boy and an older woman sit side by side, both wearing glasses.
The image shows two individuals seated closely together on what appears to be a couch. The person on the left is a young boy with short brown hair, wearing wire-rimmed glasses and a light blue t-shirt with a black collar. The person on the right is an older woman with curly gray hair, also wearing wire-rimmed glasses, dressed in a dark green collared shirt and a necklace.
A young boy looks up while standing in a living room.
A side-profile view of a young boy wearing wire-rimmed glasses and a blue t-shirt, gazing upward. He has short spiky hair on top with faded sides. The background shows a living room with a couch, wall decorations including a round mirror and framed items, and a laundry basket.
A young boy sits on a staircase.
A young boy with short hair and glasses is sitting on the middle step of a wooden staircase that has beige carpeting. He is wearing a bright orange t-shirt with a graphic print, dark shorts, and white socks with black toes. Behind him, there are light-colored cabinets and a doorway leading to another room.
A studio portrait of three children posing together.
Two older children, one girl and one boy, are seated on the floor with a baby between them. The girl wears a pink dress and holds the baby, who is dressed in a satin outfit. The boy sits behind them wearing a striped polo shirt and glasses.
Shirtless boy posing with arms wide open in a decorated living room.
A shirtless young male wearing grey underwear stands facing away from the camera with his arms extended horizontally. The room contains a rocking chair, a small table with a vase, a baby gate, and a blue playpen labeled 'GRACO'. In the background, there is a lit Christmas tree near a window.
A young boy sits in a recliner chair in a bedroom.
A young boy with dark hair and glasses is sitting cross-legged in a light blue upholstered recliner chair with an attached footrest. He wears a white t-shirt and white socks, looking off to the right side of the frame. The room contains a wooden desk with computer equipment, a black office chair, a staircase, and a bed with colorful bedding.
Two children sit on the floor in front of a lit Christmas tree.
Two young children are sitting cross-legged on a carpeted floor in front of a large, decorated Christmas tree. The older child wears glasses and a beige sweater, while the younger child has curly hair and is wearing a grey and blue jacket. Several wrapped gifts are placed under the tree, and to the right, there is a green filing cabinet with a computer monitor on top.
A young boy plays a video game while sitting on his bed in a cluttered room.
A young boy wearing glasses and a red shirt sits on the edge of a white bed, holding a black video game controller. The room has light blue walls with a colorful cityscape border, and the floor is covered with scattered crayons, toys, and papers.
A smiling boy hugs a toddler in front of a kitchen area.
A young boy wearing glasses and a Sesame Street-themed shirt kneels on a tiled floor, smiling at the camera. A small child with curly hair in a yellow dress embraces him from behind. To the left is a white refrigerator with a decorative towel hanging on it.
Young boy using a laptop at a dining table.
A young boy with short hair and glasses, wearing a white long-sleeved shirt, is seated at a polished wooden table. He is actively typing on an open silver laptop computer. To his left on the table sits a can of Pepsi Max, a glass, and a pair of scissors.
A young boy sits between two babies in a plush chair.
A young boy wearing glasses and a yellow shirt sits in the middle of a large, dark red velvet armchair. He is flanked by two infants; one on his left wears a light pink onesie and makes a peace sign with his hand, while the other on his right wears a white outfit. The setting appears to be a living room with a wooden crib visible in the background.
Three children playing together in a backyard near a play structure.
The image shows three young boys standing on a lawn in front of a wooden playhouse with a yellow slide. One boy faces the camera while the other two are turned away, appearing to interact with each other. The scene includes greenery and fencing in the background.
A young boy and baby sitting together for a portrait photo.
A studio-style photograph shows a young boy wearing round glasses and a blue plaid shirt, seated behind a smiling baby girl in a yellow floral dress. The boy has his arms around the baby, who is looking directly at the camera with an open mouth expression. They are positioned against a plain white background.
Two happy children posing closely together.
Two young children are lying on their backs, smiling broadly at the camera. The child in the foreground wears a red top and has light brown hair, while the child behind them wears a dark top and also has glasses. They appear to be resting on white bedding or fabric.
Baby dressed in Halloween attire sits in a hospital bed with a small pumpkin.
A young child is seated in what appears to be a hospital bed, wearing a colorful Halloween outfit that includes a cape and hat. The child holds a small orange pumpkin decorated with a face. An adult's arm is visible on the left side of the frame, suggesting someone is supporting or comforting the child.
A child playfully mimics holding a large ceremonial check with a ruler during a home project.
An indoor scene shows a young boy in red pajamas and glasses holding a white ruler horizontally across his shoulders, resembling a oversized ceremonial bank check. An adult is bent over working on assembling or moving a white cabinet frame on the floor. The room has yellow walls, windows, scattered papers, and construction materials.
A person is sleeping inside a baby bassinet.
A person wearing a white long-sleeved shirt and blue shorts is lying on their side, asleep, inside a portable baby bassinet. The bassinet has a light blue and white speckled fabric lining with ruffled edges and a warning label attached to the interior wall. A small camera or sensor device is visible on the side of the bassinet frame.
While waiting for our possession to move from Berkeley to State College, we stayed at Rita’s parent’s house in Michigan. My parents were living very near at that time also. Rita was about 20 weeks pregnant then and had already had two miscarriages. One night she woke me and said she thought her water broke. We went to St. Joseph’s Medical Center, and they told us that she would deliver the baby within 72 hours. At a gestational age of 21-weeks, the baby would surely not survive. They suggested aborting the pregnancy. Rita told them she couldn’t do that as she could feel the baby moving. The biggest risk in waiting was apparently infection, so we decide to wait and see. They transferred her to the University of Michigan Medical Center, where she remained on bed rest for seven weeks.
Abortions
It seems like every few years the conservatives in this country get all fired up because liberals want to allow late-term abortions. What is usually lost in the rhetoric is that what liberals want is for doctors to not be charged with murder for performing late-term abortions that are, of course, deemed medically necessary. I have to say it was pretty shocking to hear the first doctor that saw Rita propose aborting the pregnancy. He certainly was pushing this on us, but I think he thought the risk, i.e., something serious happening to Rita that could possibly lead to her not being able to have children, was much greater than the highly unlikely reward, i.e. the baby being born at least four or five weeks after the amniotic sack broke.
While I’m strongly pro-choice, I am also strongly not anti-life. Deciding whether or not to terminate the pregnancy never really seemed like an option to us as we naively didn’t see the harm in just waiting it out. I am still not quite sure what the harm in waiting was. I think the doctor just felt that there was no possible way the baby would be born at a gestational age at which it would survive. I have no idea how an abortion at 20 weeks into a pregnancy would be done. I suppose they would probably just induce labor.
This story has another abortion-related twist in that the doctors actually decided to induce labor at 28 weeks. Obviously, they did force us to do this but their argument was that, with almost no amniotic fluid buffer, the baby’s lungs were not developing as they should and most babies born at this time have good outcomes. Rita and I actually thought about this a lot but we agreed that what the doctors said made a lot of sense, so we decided to have them “abort” the pregnancy. In every sense of the word, the doctors were performing an abortion because they were inducing the termination of a pregnancy. Of course, many women have labor induced or cesarian sections, and these could all be deemed late-term abortions. Of course, the doctors doing these procedures and the women having them done have no intention for the baby to die, but what if it does?
Caleb very nearly did not make it, and it’s interesting to consider the ramifications had he not. Rita and I certainly would have second-guessed the decision to induce labor for the rest of our lives. Should the doctors have then been held responsible for Caleb’s death? While I can’t imagine Rita or I thinking this, the laws the conservatives want and the liberal fight against would have made the doctors legally culpable. If the doctors knew they might be legally liable if their best medical advice leads to death, would they not even consider doing what they thought was medically the best option?
I think Pete Buttigieg, who I hope has a long career in politics, summed it up nicely while being questioned by Fox News’ Chris Wallace who asked, “Do you believe, at any point in pregnancy, whether it’s at six weeks or eight weeks or 24 weeks or whenever, that there should be any limit on a woman’s right to have an abortion?” Buttigieg replied, “I think the dialogue has gotten so caught up on where you draw the line that we’ve gotten away from the fundamental question of who gets to draw the line, and I trust women to draw the line when it’s their own health.” When Wallace pushed him about advocating the third trimester abortions he has about the best reply I think I’ve ever heard, “That’s right, representing one percent of cases. So let’s put ourselves in the shoes of a woman in that situation. If it’s that late in your pregnancy, than almost by definition, you’ve been expecting to carry it to term. We’re talking about women who have perhaps chosen a name. Women who have purchased a crib, families that then get the most devastating medical news of their lifetime, something about the health or the life of the mother or viability of the pregnancy that forces them to make an impossible, unthinkable choice. And the bottom line is as horrible as that choice is, that woman, that family may seek spiritual guidance, they may seek medical guidance, but that decision is not going to be made any better, medically or morally, because the government is dictating how that decision should be made.”
Caleb was born on September 18, 1998, at a gestational age of 28 weeks but his lungs were severely underdeveloped from a lack of amniotic fluid in the uterus. He weighed 2.5 pounds and remained on a ventilator for nearly four weeks. While the nurses tried to prepare us for the NICU, I was completely unprepared for Caleb’s challenges. During his first day there, we watched his blood pressure drop to the single digits. The nurses started preparing us for him not to make it. Fortunately, the medication started to work, and his blood pressure slowly rose. While all the days of his nine-week stay in the NICU were not that rough, there were many more ups and downs. It was an emotional roller coaster ride, a big wake-up to the real world, and a rough welcome to becoming a father and professor. Needless to say, my first semester at PSU did not go well.
I attempted to start teaching the class I was assigned while Rita was in the hospital. Fortunately, there was a direct flight from State College to Detroit, and I made the trip numerous times. One memorable flight was when employees of Northwest Airlines had just ended their strike; besides the pilots and flight attendants, I was the only person on the plane. After a few emergency trips to Ann Arbor, the department found someone to permanently teach my class which allowed me to spend all my time in Michigan.
While Caleb coming home from the NICU was a huge step forward, it also was a very trying time for Rita and me. He was still in need of a great deal of medical attention and constant monitoring. We hooked him up to a breathing monitor at night, which constantly false alarmed. We took him repeatedly to Hershey Medical Center to determine if his retinopathy was improving or worsening. We tried everything possible to get him to gain weight. Nothing worked because I think his ultra-thin build has nothing to do with being premature. We got letters home every year from school alerting us that his BMI was in the 0.5th percentile. That’s the problem with sick kids. You never know what is a problem and what is just individuality. This has been even more of an issue with Amanda.
